Nov. 14, 2025

My Father Searched For Me Until He Died, And I Thought He Deserved It: Part One

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Elevate Your Game A rich childhood, a brilliant father who built success from nothing, and a daughter who never heard the word no—Rochelle’s story starts where many assume danger cannot reach. Then a charismatic man from two towns over rewired her beliefs about love, turned gifts into “proof” of hate, and pulled her away from everyone who could help. What follows is a blueprint of coercive control: sever the ties, move the city, change the number, assign crimes that poison the bridge back hom...

Elevate Your Game

A rich childhood, a brilliant father who built success from nothing, and a daughter who never heard the word no—Rochelle’s story starts where many assume danger cannot reach. Then a charismatic man from two towns over rewired her beliefs about love, turned gifts into “proof” of hate, and pulled her away from everyone who could help. What follows is a blueprint of coercive control: sever the ties, move the city, change the number, assign crimes that poison the bridge back home. By 20, she knew she was being used, yet the trap felt inescapable.

We walk through the hard terrain her life became: arrests, sexual assault, beatings, STDs, kidnapping and torture. Rochelle names the street—the blade—and how it strips agency and trades on shame. In parallel, her family never stops searching. They hire investigators, talk to friends, chase every rumor. She hides in plain sight and laughs at their tears to survive the crushing weight of guilt and longing. The line that breaks the room arrives quietly: her father dies while looking for her. In the numbness of trauma, she frames it as deserved. Time, however, exposes that as armor, not truth.

This conversation isn’t tidy. It’s raw, grieving and brave. We unpack how grooming preys on generosity and naivety, why wealth doesn’t shield anyone from manipulation, and how shame becomes the currency of control. Rochelle doesn’t claim a neat ending; she pauses when the emotion floods and lets silence do the work. If you’ve ever felt owned by a story that wasn’t yours, or loved someone you couldn’t reach, there’s a waypoint here—language for what happened and a small light for what comes next. If this resonated, share the episode with someone who needs it, leave a review to help others find the show, and subscribe so you don’t miss what Rochelle chooses to speak into next.

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00:00 - Introducing Rochelle “Baby Doll”

00:29 - Privilege And Early Family Life

01:10 - Groomed By The “Perfect” Guy

02:09 - Cut Off And Controlled

02:38 - Abuse, Arrests, And Survival

03:12 - A Father’s Search And A Daughter’s Grief

03:40 - Emotions Overwhelm And Pause

WEBVTT

00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.919
Hey everybody, it's Rochelle, also known as Baby Doll.

00:00:04.080 --> 00:00:11.919
I wanted to come on and introduce myself and give you a little background on why I chose Master Silk, or better yet, why he chose me.

00:00:12.080 --> 00:00:15.279
Alright, you heard about the Night China and I met Master Silk.

00:00:15.439 --> 00:00:17.760
If not, go back and listen to the episode.

00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:21.760
Pimps, players, and payback, China Doll ain't holding back.

00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:23.839
The one you've been asking for.

00:00:27.519 --> 00:00:28.960
Let's get it.

00:00:29.440 --> 00:00:35.280
I came from a very wealthy family that began with absolutely nothing.

00:00:35.759 --> 00:00:39.280
Until my father started his own construction company.

00:00:39.679 --> 00:00:45.200
I was the only girl, and I admit, I was spoiled, rotten.

00:00:45.520 --> 00:00:50.240
Even when my family couldn't afford it, they made it happen for me.

00:00:50.960 --> 00:00:55.200
Then I had everything I ever wanted or needed.

00:00:55.359 --> 00:01:00.079
I would ask for things I didn't need just to see if I'd get it.

00:01:00.560 --> 00:01:01.200
I would.

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Growing up, there was nothing I didn't have.

00:01:07.359 --> 00:01:10.239
If I wanted it, I got it.

00:01:10.719 --> 00:01:17.760
I met a guy two towns over that convinced me that my family didn't love me.

00:01:18.239 --> 00:01:22.640
And that they only bought me things to mask their hate for me.

00:01:22.879 --> 00:01:26.799
Deep down inside, I knew that they loved me.

00:01:27.840 --> 00:01:30.640
But this guy was fine as hell.

00:01:31.040 --> 00:01:33.519
So whatever he said, I believed.

00:01:36.079 --> 00:01:39.680
I eventually realized I was being used.

00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:47.359
But by the time I was 20 and several new inexperienced YN folks later, it was too late.

00:01:47.599 --> 00:01:51.359
I eventually would never see my family again.

00:01:51.760 --> 00:01:54.239
Not because I didn't want to.

00:02:09.599 --> 00:02:12.800
And go back home because he owned me now.

00:02:13.280 --> 00:02:18.000
He had me do things to try and ruin my family's lives.

00:02:18.240 --> 00:02:26.400
He had me lie on them to the police, go back when I knew they weren't home and steal from them anything that he could sell.

00:02:26.719 --> 00:02:28.000
It didn't work.

00:02:28.400 --> 00:02:31.280
They thrived without me.

00:02:31.520 --> 00:02:35.840
Yet they never stopped looking for me.

00:02:36.080 --> 00:02:38.000
They always searched for me.

00:02:38.159 --> 00:02:42.479
They'd hire countless private detectives, spoke with my old friends.

00:02:42.639 --> 00:02:44.719
They did everything to find me.

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While I hid in plain sight.

00:02:47.599 --> 00:02:52.080
When I heard they were missing me and crying over me, I laughed.

00:02:52.319 --> 00:02:56.000
I changed towns and phone numbers constantly.

00:02:56.240 --> 00:03:01.439
I was arrested, sexually assaulted, beat up and contracted sexually transmitted diseases.

00:03:01.680 --> 00:03:03.520
I was kidnapped and tortured.

00:03:03.680 --> 00:03:07.599
Whatever you can think of that could happen to a woman on the blade happened to me.

00:03:07.919 --> 00:03:11.919
But they still wanted their little girl back home.

00:03:12.159 --> 00:03:18.400
A few years after I had left home, I heard my father was killed while searching for me.

00:03:18.639 --> 00:03:22.319
He was at the wrong place at the wrong time looking for me.

00:03:22.639 --> 00:03:28.400
Sad thing is, back then I really thought that serves him right.

00:03:28.639 --> 00:03:34.080
I still believe the way that my life turned out was all his fault.

00:03:34.400 --> 00:03:40.080
I never even got to say goodbye or tell him that I loved him.

00:03:40.400 --> 00:03:42.560
Sorry for crying like this.

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I'm sorry I have to stop for now.

00:03:45.439 --> 00:03:49.039
I had no idea this would upset me so much.

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I really thought I was over all of this.